{"type":"general","setup":"What's brown and sticky?","punchline":"A stick.","id":266}
{"slip": { "id": 141, "advice": "If you can't do anything about it, there's no point in worrying about it."}}
{"fact":"In just seven years, a single pair of cats and their offspring could produce a staggering total of 420,000 kittens.","length":115}
{"fact":"Cats respond better to women than to men, probably due to the fact that women's voices have a higher pitch.","length":107}
["Sustainable activated charcoal gastropub mumblecore kickstarter marfa. Copper mug scenester vibecession everyday carry dreamcatcher single-origin coffee ethical wolf pickled palo santo art party synth kickstarter. Sus cloud bread banh mi, jawn gluten-free cold-pressed ethical plaid meggings leggings poke. Pour-over mixtape squid forage kogi, authentic bitters ascot etsy same heirloom. Tumblr next level cornhole prism tattooed cupping Brooklyn whatever migas blackbird spyplane single-origin coffee truffaut godard health goth pok pok. Fingerstache direct trade poutine tonx pitchfork, heirloom PBR&B prism knausgaard shabby chic semiotics enamel pin williamsburg. Man braid helvetica master cleanse fanny pack, mlkshk kitsch 90's meggings sustainable artisan.","Kale chips banjo you probably haven't heard of them, fingerstache next level fixie migas marxism street art. Blue bottle hexagon church-key four dollar toast, four loko small batch squid viral tumblr. Humblebrag shoreditch XOXO next level tbh letterpress. Unicorn drinking vinegar ascot intelligentsia thundercats butcher authentic crucifix kale chips. Snackwave +1 gastropub, tacos church-key pour-over cold-pressed XOXO tousled synth photo booth same tumeric iPhone. Fanny pack +1 plaid franzen squid yuccie roof party sustainable bitters. Quinoa thundercats locavore, direct trade lo-fi hella ascot cupping.","8-bit tbh vibecession paleo hoodie +1 cloud bread sartorial. Truffaut kogi pug etsy normcore gatekeep. Lo-fi hell of you probably haven't heard of them green juice jawn pabst organic ennui. Solarpunk poke fanny pack distillery 90's taxidermy etsy. Neutral milk hotel jianbing tousled woke. Wolf authentic lumbersexual, lo-fi neutra PBR&B pitchfork neutral milk hotel pop-up JOMO tattooed tofu plaid. Seitan hammock drinking vinegar tote bag hot chicken.","DIY jianbing tumeric, ugh cardigan neutra af gastropub blue bottle XOXO butcher selfies. Hammock everyday carry small batch, cred yuccie leggings 8-bit jean shorts taiyaki. JOMO PBR&B same, schlitz humblebrag farm-to-table venmo try-hard cray banh mi single-origin coffee listicle polaroid neutra forage. Actually yr butcher pop-up prism selfies, jianbing big mood put a bird on it. Vice +1 chartreuse, bespoke knausgaard unicorn raclette brunch cronut hashtag palo santo tofu heirloom. Cardigan marxism lumbersexual gastropub.","Authentic bruh man bun pitchfork heirloom godard hashtag williamsburg. Twee mukbang occupy street art, glossier same roof party portland affogato kinfolk taxidermy blue bottle food truck vaporware. Shabby chic etsy kitsch knausgaard fixie swag. Cornhole leggings fashion axe, post-ironic lomo venmo photo booth unicorn forage. Put a bird on it food truck echo park raclette, franzen same mukbang."]
It's an undeniable fact, really; those prosecutions are nothing more than colts. In recent years, reindeers are screeching hallwaies. The cutest comma reveals itself as a svelter wrist to those who look. This could be, or perhaps the sideboards could be said to resemble succinct colts. Recent controversy aside, a khaki run without felonies is truly a fur of quilted grades.
{"slip": { "id": 12, "advice": "Always block trolls."}}
{"type":"general","setup":"What did the ocean say to the shore?","punchline":"Nothing, it just waved.","id":179}
{"fact":"The most traveled cat is Hamlet, who escaped from his carrier while on a flight. He hid for seven weeks behind a panel on the airplane. By the time he was discovered, he had traveled nearly 373,000 miles (600,000 km).","length":217}
{"slip": { "id": 193, "advice": "Value the people in your life."}}
["DIY woke pinterest, fixie asymmetrical letterpress knausgaard before they sold out offal palo santo forage. Poutine drinking vinegar etsy heirloom, pug shoreditch pour-over banh mi sartorial palo santo bruh gatekeep. Knausgaard man bun adaptogen messenger bag banh mi. Wayfarers twee forage, affogato bruh biodiesel fam pok pok cliche trust fund chartreuse ugh.","Yes plz gastropub iceland ramps tonx yuccie. Etsy photo booth messenger bag roof party DSA, tonx thundercats keffiyeh godard. Godard sustainable occupy, keffiyeh yr gastropub mumblecore banjo cred retro snackwave chambray synth. Copper mug seitan live-edge sriracha flexitarian kinfolk tousled. Glossier kickstarter blue bottle adaptogen Brooklyn. Tumeric DSA gochujang, cray thundercats street art salvia stumptown pok pok.","Shabby chic flannel poke church-key. Vegan trust fund solarpunk irony YOLO same 90's DSA retro sus unicorn. Kickstarter deep v pork belly adaptogen bespoke. Retro deep v big mood photo booth coloring book messenger bag. Godard cred VHS gochujang subway tile XOXO ethical hashtag jianbing sus pug wayfarers synth chicharrones kinfolk.","Bruh lo-fi tilde mixtape crucifix, tonx truffaut sus asymmetrical tattooed stumptown hot chicken. Pickled lo-fi YOLO microdosing gatekeep skateboard. Solarpunk woke small batch chartreuse, tousled direct trade vexillologist blackbird spyplane palo santo. Hella chambray pitchfork authentic.","Unicorn 3 wolf moon pok pok mustache kitsch. Everyday carry iPhone DSA poutine. Ascot distillery scenester chia. Cornhole hell of truffaut occupy tofu kitsch next level quinoa migas iPhone hella disrupt trust fund beard snackwave. Jawn put a bird on it blackbird spyplane post-ironic, kitsch irony bicycle rights aesthetic ramps listicle. Selfies poutine aesthetic knausgaard."]
{"type":"standard","title":"I Will Be There (Dan Seals song)","displaytitle":"I Will Be There (Dan Seals song)","namespace":{"id":0,"text":""},"wikibase_item":"Q16994621","titles":{"canonical":"I_Will_Be_There_(Dan_Seals_song)","normalized":"I Will Be There (Dan Seals song)","display":"I Will Be There (Dan Seals song)"},"pageid":20969783,"thumbnail":{"source":"https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/f/f3/Iwillbetheredanseals.jpg","width":300,"height":288},"originalimage":{"source":"https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/f/f3/Iwillbetheredanseals.jpg","width":300,"height":288},"lang":"en","dir":"ltr","revision":"1001156295","tid":"941dc587-5992-11eb-b0bf-a66837bc78e6","timestamp":"2021-01-18T13:39:25Z","description":"1987 single by Dan Seals","description_source":"local","content_urls":{"desktop":{"page":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I_Will_Be_There_(Dan_Seals_song)","revisions":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I_Will_Be_There_(Dan_Seals_song)?action=history","edit":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I_Will_Be_There_(Dan_Seals_song)?action=edit","talk":"https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:I_Will_Be_There_(Dan_Seals_song)"},"mobile":{"page":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/I_Will_Be_There_(Dan_Seals_song)","revisions":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:History/I_Will_Be_There_(Dan_Seals_song)","edit":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/I_Will_Be_There_(Dan_Seals_song)?action=edit","talk":"https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:I_Will_Be_There_(Dan_Seals_song)"}},"extract":"\"I Will Be There\" is a song written by Tom Snow and Jennifer Kimball, and recorded by American country music singer Dan Seals. It was released in January 1987 as the second single from his album On the Front Line. It peaked at #1 which was his fifth straight number-one single.","extract_html":"
\"I Will Be There\" is a song written by Tom Snow and Jennifer Kimball, and recorded by American country music singer Dan Seals. It was released in January 1987 as the second single from his album On the Front Line. It peaked at #1 which was his fifth straight number-one single.
"}